Fourth of july - maga edition

On this grand holiday it is only right that the progress in "making America great again" is updated. 

SCOTUS: fearless leader Trump has interviewed seven candidates for the seat vacated by Anthony Kennedy and all signs point to him selecting a troglodyte to reverse Roe vs Wade, destroy the ACA, affirmative action, and maintain the court's affirmation of corporatocracy. On the political front, Senator Susan Collins of Maine continues her obfuscation about her vote being a possible swing against the nominee. Based on her history of being "pro-life", most observers figure she will fold as usual just as she did on the GOP Tax (scam) Bill . Precedence be damned!

Immigration: three federal judges have ruled against Trump's humane program of kidnapping immigrant kids from their parents. Those commie pinkos have no idea the threat posed by these kids breaking into our country. The country is full, dammit! But on the positive side, private prisons are seeing a surge in stock prices due to our leader's brilliant domestic policies of "zero tolerance" and the revived "war on drugs". This will allow them to donate even more money to the GOP for the midterms. Hail to the leader!

Foreign policy: fearless leader is preparing for the next NATO meeting with our chintzy allies who insist on raising tariffs on American products and not doing their fair share of building adequate defenses against imagined threats. 

Domestic policy: fearless leader has ended the discriminatory affirmative action policies of the last administration which favored the hordes of minorities admitted to our finest institutions. Long live the 1950's! Also, HUD has raised the rents on low-income housing dwellers who consistently waste their money on luxury cars, Iphones, and new clothes. 

Well, that sums up the great progress being made on this most patriotic of all holidays, enjoy the fireworks.